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A Memory of Belize

For the past couple of weeks there’s been some construction going on at a house a couple of doors up the street towards the main road. They’ve been building a big fence and front wall/gate and doing repairs to the drainage ditch in front of the house. About mid morning, today, a rather large dump truck showed up and left left several cubic yards of dirt in the middle of the road.

Almost immediately three young men started shoveling the dirt into a wheel barrow and spreading it around for re-landscaping. Watching them working away under the hot sun took me back to an afternoon in Caye Caulker, Belize, when I was sailing the reef in my beloved Nancy Dawson on my way down to the Rio Dulce in Guatemala.

Twenty years ago there was still a tradition of working sailboats in Belize. Most of the boats the lobster fishermen used to get to and from the off-lying atolls were powered by sail. A good deal of the non-perishable goods consumed on the inhabited islands north of Belize City were brought there on sailing craft like this one:

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I was anchored a little bit off the city dock on the leeward side of the island and getting ready to prepare my lunch. At that time I hadn’t discovered the little house nearby where a woman set up three card tables on her front porch at lunch time and served the most mouth-watering lobster tostadas you could ever imagine. They were a made with a crispy, flat tortilla shell slathered with a coating of refried black beans and then a generous serving of lobster salad topped with lettuce, tomatoes and shredded cheese. They only cost a buck U.S., two dollars Belize. But I digress…and salivate a little at the memory.

Anyway, down in the cabin of my boat I heard a couple of commands being issued in a lilting Belize accent and when I looked up I saw a boat like one of those pictured above piled high with a load of shells gliding towards the dock. The large gaff mainsail came down on the run leaving a tiny handkerchief-sized jib to provide steerage way for the final approach. The boat, about 40 foot long, slipped silently towards the dock. At the last minute the jib was back-winded and with a deft touch of the tiller the boat lay alongside the dock so softly it wouldn’t have cracked an egg between it and the pilings. The docking was a thing of beauty bespeaking years of experience and the accumulation of seamanship lost to most of today’s sailors.

Almost immediately after a couple of lines were run around the pilings the four men in the crew broke out shovels and started to pile the shells up onto the dock. I expected the appearance of a front-end loader to show up at any minute to start moving the growing pile of shell off the dock, but I was mistaken. When the mound on the dock reached some predetermined height one of the men got off the boat with his shovel and started working away at that pile and making another pile behind him while the three remaining on the boat kept toiling away. When the second pile had grown  to another predetermined height a second man joined the first man onshore and started shoveling away at the second pile, making a third pile.

Eventually all the shell was out of the boat and there were a series of shell piles leading away from the dock. All afternoon, and without a break, the men shoveled away creating piles that leapfrogged away from the water’s edge to eventually come to rest at a spot a good fifty yards away. Knowing what I know now, from having ordered dumpsters for my friend’s construction company, I’d say that there was a good 10 cubic yards of shell that had been moved by the four men.

When the work was over they retired back aboard the boat and reclined in the shade provided by a tarp rigged over the main boom and there they passed the rest of the afternoon drinking bottles of Belikan beer. As the sun set they lit up a fire in a sand-filled box on deck and cooked their supper.

A couple of hours later the land breeze began to pick up. They slipped the lines from the dock, raised the jib and deftly turned the bow off the dock. As soon as they gathered steerage they hoisted the large gaff mainsail to the sounds of some “Punta Rock” from a boom box. As they slid past me and Nancy the fragrance of some of Belize’s finest illicit agricultural produce drifted across the water and they were soon swallowed up in the dark.

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Meteor Fizzle in Boquerón

Next to man-made fireworks I like celestial ones, too. Early this morning (Jan 4) there was supposed to be a super meteor shower from 2 a.m. on. The Quadrantids shower was hyped up to have upwards of 80 to 100 “shooting stars” per hour. I set my alarm for 2:30 hoping to see some pyrotechnics to possibly rival what the locals put up on Christmas and New Years Eves.  Well, it was a washout here, if, indeed, anyone could have seen them in Panama to begin with. It was heavily overcast with clouds and only three or four stars were visible through tiny holes in the sky. Oh, well.

I’ve seen one before. Often when I tell people about my single-handed cruise on my beloved “Nancy Dawson” back in 1992 people ask, “Don’t you wish you’d had someone with you?” Well, the answer, for the most part is “Not always, but there were some events it would have been nice to share with someone.”

One of those times was when I was anchored out off the tiny island of Ranguana Caye at the edge of the reef in Belize. It was a lovely, isolated spot and everything a tropical islet is supposed to be. Small, at the edge of a coral barrier reef with a long line of breaking surf off to seaward, and covered with dozens of coconut palms. I was anchored in about 7 feet of crystal clear water on the leeward side of the island. A gentleman I’d met in the small town of Placencia owned the island and was building three tiny cabins that he hoped would earn him his fortune renting them out to dive tourists. He and a couple of helpers would come out during the week to work on the cabins but most of the week I spent there I was by myself.

One night I was lying out in my hammock that I’d strung up between the mast and the fore stay. I had finished off the last of a righteous bud I’d bought a week before from “Dancing Sam the Rasta Man” who had a small house beside the town’s famous “sidewalk.” I reclined there in my hammock miles and miles from the nearest artificial light. There was no moon, even. Just this wonderful canopy of a gajillion stars in the sky above. Marcia Ball, Doctor John and the Neville Brothers drifted up from the boom box in the cabin below.

And then the light show began, as if just for me. It was early August and the earth was moving through the Perseids belt. Shooting stars blazed all across the sky. For the next couple of hours not a minute went by without at least two or three and often dozens of meteor trails shooting across the heavens. And when I’d look over the side of the boat long luminescent trails ran in all directions as medium-sized fish chased little fish and big fish chased the medium-sized ones all intent on a fresh sushi night cap. THAT’S when I wish I’d had someone along to share the moment with.

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One More Good Adventure 2011 in Review

The WordPress.com stats helper monkeys prepared a 2011 annual report for this blog.

Here’s an excerpt:

The concert hall at the Syndey Opera House holds 2,700 people. This blog was viewed about 35,000 times in 2011. If it were a concert at Sydney Opera House, it would take about 13 sold-out performances for that many people to see it.

Click here to see the complete report.

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We Get Spam

Just like your email account we get spammed all the time here on our WordPress blogs. Though I’ve never gotten any letters telling me that some rich Nigerian general left millions of dollars that could be mine if I just turn over my bank account numbers to the sender of the message, nor do I get spams asking me if I want to enlarge my breasts and/or penis. What I DO get is weird enough.

Today when I opened this blog I found 19 spam messages in the “Junk” folder. What I find so interesting about the people who send this stuff is that they have so much time on their hands and virtually no imagination. All 19 of these spam messages were concerning the “About” section of the blog where I outline, briefly the intent of the blog and a little about my background. The following are the spam messages I received today. YOU figure it out…

From Pozycjonowanie Top: Hmm is anyone else encountering problems with the images on this blog loading? I’m trying to find out if its a problem on my end or if it’s the blog. Any feed-back would be greatly appreciated.

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Christmas Eve In Boquerón, Panama

I LOVE fireworks. Who doesn’t? Well, my old dog, Penny. Just ask her. You like fireworks, girl?

I guess not.

I’ve seen some pretty good fireworks in my time. Of course the ones when you’re a kid are always spectacular since they’re such a new experience. As you grow older they have to get better. In the States, of course, most fireworks are professionally done. Oh, there are firecrackers. Cherry bombs and M-80s were wonderful when we could get them since they were illegal and cost most of a week’s allowance. But what fun!

Fireworks are a big part of celebrations in New Orleans. I remember one New Year’s Eve out at a girlfriend’s house in Metaire the whole neighborhood was setting off fireworks and the smoke was actually so thick it was like a fog between the houses. And when the World Fair was running in New Orleans they closed each night with a fireworks display. Most evenings I’d go sit out on the glider swing in the back yard and watch them light up the sky over the “Moon Walk” down by the French Quarter.

The Bi-Centennial display in Chicago in 1976 was pretty impressive. I was running a 300-passenger sight seeing boat seen here on the cover of a Chicago Yellow Pages.

Of course I had to work that night and we had the boat filled to capacity but it was still fun watching them from the water.

Without a doubt the best fireworks display I EVER saw was in Cannes, France, for their Bi-Centennial Bastille Day celebration. The fireworks were set off from three different locations: a barge moored out in the bay, one on a hillside to the west of the town and one from a hillside behind the town. When the displays went off overhead from the three locations at the same time it gave one a sensation of vertigo. And the whole thing was done synchronized to music. They’re big on that in France. Every year during the month of August there is an international fireworks competition in the village of Juan les Pins, adjacent to Antibes, and those displays are also choreographed to music.

Here in Panama fireworks are a big part of the Christmas Eve celebration. Why? I have no idea. But there are fireworks stands all over the area. The other day I went to the Chiriqui Mall and a huge, inflatable tent had been set up out front selling KaBoom “Fuegos Articifiales.”

For the past week kids in the neighborhood have been setting off firecrackers every now and them Some were definitely in the cherry bomb and M-80 category. LOUD. Then, last night things began to heat up. Sitting on my front porch you could hear firecrackers going off all around. Just listen to this. There’s no picture, but you can hear the noise. It must have sounded a little like this at the start of the “shock and awe” part of the invasion of Iraq.

That went on non-stop for well over an hour.

Now, my neighborhood is solidly middle class. There are no McMansions here. Only 25% of the families own a car. These are either retired Panamanians or solid working folks. What happened at midnight I can only speculate on how they were able to afford such a display. I suspect that the different families might have pooled their money to be able to afford what went on for a good 15 to 20 minutes non-stop. This is just a glimpse.

I thought it was quite impressive considering it was entirely funded out of the neighbors own pockets.

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Feliz Hanukwanzmas One And All

Well, it’s that time of year again, and I’m not talking about the Republican Presidential Primary Debates. I’m talking about Hanukwanzmas. That time when people of good will make fun of each other’s traditions. For example Sarah (The Queen of the I-Quitarod) Palin AND Faux Gnus have been criticizing President Obama’s family Christmas card this year.

Palin told Fox News that she found it “odd” that the card emphasizes the dog instead of traditions like “family, faith and freedom.” She also said that Americans are able to appreciate “American foundational values illustrated and displayed on Christmas cards and on a Christmas tree.”

Of course the fact that NO president in the past century has used the word “Christmas” matters not one whit to the true-believer Tali-Christian. Palin sees the season like this:

I hope John McCain realizes that there is a new and special layer of hell set up just for him for unleashing this woman on an unsuspecting American populace. (It’s one level higher than where Five Deferment Dick Cheny is going to spend eternity being water-boarded even after realizing that it IS torture.) Anyway, when is this woman’s fifteen minutes going to be up?

I actually like the Hanukwanzmas season except for one thing. I loathe and despise the piped-in Muzak Hanukwanzmas songs that it is impossible to escape from every time you enter a store or public building like an airport terminal. When I’m in charge of everything things are going to change drastically. Piped-in Hanukwanzmas music will only be allowed to be played from 6 p.m. until midnight Hanukwanzmas Eve. Anyone violating this rule will be eviscerated and their innards will be used to decorate the Hanukwanzmas tree in Rockefeller Center like tinsel garlands.Yesterday, Tuesday, December 20th, I went into the El Rey supermarket in David to pay my light bill and was aurally assaulted by “Rudolph The Red Nose Reindeer,” in ENGLISH no less. Can you imagine the uproar that would be heard around the redneck states back in the Great White North if they played Christmas Songs in Spanish? Thankfully I haven’t heard “Grandma Got Run Over By A Reindeer” or any of the Alvin and the Chipmunk songs down here.

No, I’m NOT  a Grinch. I think Hanukwanzmas is the greatest thing for kids EVER. In fact, when I’m in charge of everything it will be against the law to tell anyone under 21 the truth about Santa Clause, Papa Noel, Father Christmas. At 21 a person can legally purchase alcohol to soothe the horrible loss of innocence the news will bring. Younger than 21 is just too cruel to contemplate.

When I got on the bus to return home yesterday an old man got on board with a small, pink, two-wheel bicycle for his grand daughter. I HOPE it was his grand daughter because if it was for his grandson there are going to be some real serious identity issues coming to the fore later in life. I looked at the bike with the usual jaundiced Gringo eye and saw what it was. A poorly-made piece of Chinese crap that will be lucky to make it through the first week before the plastic training wheels disintegrate. But that was my initial reaction. And then I realized the truth about what that bike really meant to him and what it will to the loved one he gives it to. In a country where the national minimum wage is a little less than $400 that bike took a huge chunk out of that man’s pocket. One could tell he didn’t have much to begin with just by looking at his clothes. But that little girl is going to feel like a princess when she unwraps it Christmas morning. Her FIRST bike and her “abuelo” gave it to her. He will be the brightest star in her firmament forever. It’s a crying shame that EVERY kid can’t feel like that this Sunday.

While I DO hate the piped-in Muzak version of Hanukwanzmas songs I’m NOT opposed to the following. It was turning dark when this group of kids from a local Methodist church came in to my yard. I know the vids are dark but when the sun sets here this close to the equator there’s no real twilight. It’s light, the sun sets and then it’s DARK! I used the night setting on the camera and a little clip-on light. As the kids come into the yard you will hear someone say, “Parada!” That’s the Spanish word for “Stop.” My hand appears when I waved back at the little girl with the Santa hat on the right.

Here’s wishing everyone a very Merry Hanukwanzmas and a fantastic new year.

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Laugh? I Thought I’d Die!

Sitting here in Boquerón listening to the 4:8 Eagles whipping the 4:8 Mami Dolphins 24 – 10 late in the 3rd quarter on a streaming radio feed via the internet I needed something to lift my spirits so I clicked in to the book section of the Huffington Post and came across a post called, The Worst Book Ever!

While the book is out of print you can still go to the Amazon site, here, and read such great reviews as that by Benjamin L. Hamilton gave the book a rave 5-star review:

After the divorce my diet consisted primarily of uncooked ramen and whiskey. Occasionally I wondered aloud if I’d ever have another home cooked meal again.

Then I discovered “Microwave for One” and everything changed.

My favorite chapters were:

Chapter 1: Plugging in your Microwave and You

Chapter 4: How to Wait 3 Minutes

Chapter 11 [BONUS CHAPTER]: Eating with Cats

In closing, I give this book 2 thumbs up (and a paw!). Thanks Sonia Allison!

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Texan J. Fischer didn’t think much of it and only gave the book a single star, writing:

I expected this to have the recepies that normal people eat, like Norway Roof Rat, robin, cardinal, and other backyard birds,or even kittens and puppies but I was disapointed because it was about things that rich people buy at the store like cow meat and chickens.

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Michael Pemulis gave the book a lukewarm three-star review, writing:

It used to be that I got home from work and the only thing I’d want to put in my mouth was the cold barrel of my grandfather’s shotgun. Then I discovered Sonia Allison’s Chicken Tetrazzini, and now there are two things.

All together there are 36 other reviews all of which are worth reading.

 

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I Wish I Could!

I don’t know if I’ve mentioned it here before, but I hate Facebook. More than that, I abhor it. Loathe it with a passion. Despise it almost beyond description. The ONLY reason I have a Facebook page is because one of my brothers sent me a request a couple of years ago wanting to be one of my “friends.” What are you going to do? Tell a brother, “No, I don’t want to be your “friend?” “I never liked you when we were kids, why would I want to be your friend now?” Of course not. I DO like my brother. Always have. I think he’s a great guy and I’m very proud of him and ALL my brothers. So I signed up, of course.

Just a few minutes ago I got a “notification” from Facebook that said:

Hi Richard,
You have 1 friend with a birthday in the next week. Help him celebrate!
Gerry GlombeckiGerry Glombecki
65 years old · Write on his wall.
There’s a problem with this notice…Gerry died in May 2010. I wrote about him when I found out.
Help him celebrate? I only wish I could!

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Age Old Question Finally Answered —

Yes they do!

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Occupy Wall Street Fail

via Bits & Pieces

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